


All You Knead Is Love

by SomeSleepySloth



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Baking Innuendos, Crack, Fluff, Inspired by The Great British Bake Off, M/M, Misunderstandings, Oblivious Alec Lightwood
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-13
Updated: 2021-01-13
Packaged: 2021-03-17 12:47:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,756
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28725324
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SomeSleepySloth/pseuds/SomeSleepySloth
Summary: The Great British Bake Off AU where one is a judge and the other is a hostOr'The Bake Off is a televised baking competition, in which a group of amateur bakers compete against each other, attempting to impress the judges with their baking skills. However, host Magnus Bane is more interested in impressing one judge in particular- Alec Lightwood' - AceOnIce, 2021
Relationships: Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood
Comments: 13
Kudos: 183
Collections: Hunter's Moon Fic Recs





	All You Knead Is Love

**Author's Note:**

> That's it, I have officially peaked in life. I wrote a Great British Bake Off AU. This was inspired by a convo I had while watching GBBO with my friends because we couldn't stop laughing at the innuendos.
> 
> Beta'd by the amazing [AceOnIce](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AceOnIce/pseuds/AceOnIce). She also does great summaries. I should just outsource everything to her in the future. Including the writing :fingerguns:

“For today’s technical challenge, Alec and Izzy would like you to bake twelve Pistachio Florentines. And now, much as I would love to have you both around, especially you, Alexander, I am going to have to ask you both to leave. Off you go now,” Magnus commands, making shooing motions in the direction of the judges who trot out of the tent obligingly. 

As the pair of siblings traipse across the lawn to the judge’s tent, Izzy can’t help but ask her brother, “so, when are you going to ask him out?”

To his utter consternation, Alec promptly trips over a loose blade of grass; his fast reflexes are the only thing that keep him from falling flat on his face. “Who-wha-what are you talking about?” he stammers out, throwing a furtive glance behind him in case there are cameras trailing after them. Not that there were, the audience didn’t need to see two judges walking to their tent, not when there were bakers to be focusing on. His face is flushed red as Izzy cackles delightedly beside him. 

“I’m talking about Magnus, you idiot,” his sister retorts, rolling her eyes at her brother’s pathetic attempt at evading the question, “he has been flirting with you since he joined last season.”

“He hasn’t!” Alec protests, waving his hand dismissively, “he’s just friendly. And it’s all part of his television personality.”

“Really,” this time Izzy’s voice goes flat, her tone dripping with sarcasm “saying that they’ve got to ‘beat it until it’s really really stiff’ while stroking a rolling pin and looking you in the eye is _friendly_? Sometimes I wonder what goes on in that mind of yours, dear brother.”

Quite frankly, Alec doesn’t really know what goes on in his mind half-- no actually, _ninety_ percent of the time too. 

While he knew of Magnus Bane (everyone in the United States knew of the famous actor slash fashion designer), it wasn’t until the Great American Bake Off had been cancelled and subsequently picked up by a new television network, that Alec met Magnus for the very first time. 

Alec had been sorry to part company with Helen and Aline, the two previous hosts, after working with them for the past five seasons, however sometimes one just had to roll with the punches in the television industry. It is what it is, that’s what he told himself constantly. 

From their very first meeting, things between Magnus and him had been… interesting. The younger man had swanned into the filming site with far too much enthusiasm for seven in the morning. There was a slight sway to his hips as he walked up to Alec and introduced himself; brown eyes raking over Alec’s lanky frame, and tongue curling over his name, “Alexander Lightwood”. He preferred Alec, but when his name slipped out of those pink lips so silkily, like a purr, he decided that Magnus could call him that any time he wanted.

“He’s flirting with you,” Izzy had nudged his ribs the minute Magnus had turned away to mingle with the bakers. Alec had been inclined to agree with his sister’s judgement initially, he wasn’t oblivious to how Magnus’ fingers had trailed against his palm at their first handshake. 

But as his gaze trailed after Magnus, seeing him flitting between the bakers, his bright laughter ringing through the tent, his palm coming up to pat them on the shoulders, he felt his heart sinking, and he wasn’t so certain anymore. Afterall, why would Magnus Bane, a renowned celebrity, flirt with him? He was just a judge on a baking show. He wasn’t the star of the newest Captain Marvel movie, unlike a certain Camille Belcourt, Magnus’ ex-girlfriend. 

Consequently, Alec told himself to not read too much into things, but it wasn’t easy because the host took every opportunity to make innuendos. They were only five episodes into the latest season, and Twitter had been abuzz with Magnus’ innuendos once again, or as they dubbed it, the Magnnuendos; Alec personally thought that was a terrible portmanteau. 

To the delight of the American public, Magnus’ innuendo game had ramped up in the past two weeks. During cake week, when Alec had complimented Simon on his lemon drizzle cake which tasted absolutely delightful, a perfectly baked sponge and the lemon flavour which just burst in his mouth, Magnus had chimed in with the gem - “Looks like you’ve got great penetration there.”

Alec had thankfully swallowed his mouthful of cake before that comment slipped out, sparing him the embarrassment of choking in front of Magnus, Izzy, and the ten other bakers in the tent. It didn’t stop his tratorious mind from drifting to a different sort of penetration, one that involved significantly less cakes. 

Pastry week had been when the American audience discovered Magnus’ fascination with Alec’s bum. “For this morning’s signature challenge, you will need to bake twelve Cornish pasties. They can be of any shape you’d like them to be,” he had announced, before adding with a cheeky grin, “personally, mine would be the shape of Alexander's delicious buttocks!" 

If anything, Alec was relieved that Magnus was the host and not a baker because he had no desire to see the shape of his bum immortalised in pastry form on television. 

However, with each filming session, Alec was starting to feel exhausted and drained. 

Over the past year, he had found himself reeled in by Magnus, his sparkling personality, the way he engaged in conversation with Alec, appearing genuinely interested in what he was saying, even when he went off on a tangent about the intricacies of baking the deceptively easy Battenberg cakes. Any time that they were off-camera, Magnus would drift towards him, regaling him with tales of his on-set antics from his movies. It gave Alec an insight into the film industry, something that had always fascinated him since he saw his first film as a young boy. 

And the way he brightened up every room he stepped into with his bubbly personality and sparkling wit, Alec had finally found himself a worthy partner for his dry humour. His heart beat faster in Magnus’ presence, his smiles flowed a little easier.

When Magnus had teared up a little upon announcing the elimination of Clary, Alec had half a mind to declare that week a non-elimination week, something his sister would have eviscerated him for.

He knew he had fallen in love with the host, which he had made the mistake of admitting to Izzy one night while drunk. But he had never pursued it, never dared to ask Magnus out, because that was just setting himself up for failure, or as he diplomatically put it to his sister, “I simply do not wish to jeopardise a perfectly functioning professional relationship.”

Which brings him to the present moment, sitting in the judge’s tent, waiting for the camera crew to set up for the segment where he and Izzy discuss the Florentine cookies that Alec had baked earlier today, while his sister pesters him with questions. _Again_. 

“Alec,” she begins.

“Look Izzy, I know you mean well, but I don’t wish to discuss this further,” he interrupts, massaging his temples wearily.

“Fine, whatever, your loss,” she retorts huffily. 

Thankfully, the camera crew had finished setting up in the meantime, allowing Alec to distract himself with filming.

An hour and a half later, Izzy and Alec are summoned back to the tent. In front of them is the gingham-covered table, with eight plates of Florentine biscuits. Clapping her hands enthusiastically, Izzy says, “These actually do look good. You bakers have done well. Shall we start from the left?”

Alec nods and he breaks the biscuit on the leftmost plate. He is pleased to note that it breaks apart with a snap, something he makes sure to compliment the unknown baker for, “this first one has a nice and clean snap, something we were looking for.” Judging by the way Simon preens a little and sits straighter in his seat, Alec guesses that this first plate is his. The technical challenge is meant to be judged blind, but sometimes the bakers’ facial expressions give them away. 

Izzy has moved to the second plate; this one is slightly softer and crumbles apart too easily in her hands. She hands a morsel to Alec for him to try; sometimes the texture isn’t right, but the flavour could make up for it. “Right, here we can see that this one doesn’t have that snap, it could be because of the large nuts,” she remarks, the smile at the corner of her lips a dead giveaway that she knew precisely what her words sounded like. The tent breaks into tittering laughter. Five year olds, the lot of them.

At that moment, Magnus pipes up, “I’ve seen bigger”, the smirk he sends Alec making it clear who the intended recipient of that remark is. And in a twist of fate, Alec chokes on his mouthful of the biscuit, a large nut nearly getting stuck in his throat, causing him to break out into coughs to try and dislodge the stray pistachio. The host immediately races to his side, his hand coming down to thump on Alec’s back. Thankfully, Alec manages to force out the errant nut.

Someone from the crew had retrieved a bottle of water in the meantime; Alec twists open the cap and gulps the water down, the cold water soothing his dry throat. As he slowly recovers from nearly asphyxiating on a large nut, Magnus remains by his side. The hand that had been hitting his back earlier is now rubbing soothing circles, the warmth from Magnus’ large palm gently caressing his back helping to calm his frazzled nerves.

“Are you okay?” the host asks, his eyebrows knitted together in worry.

“Yeah, yeah I am, thanks,” Alec replies dismissively, before quickly moving on to the third plate. Magnus’ hand hovers mid-air momentarily before he lowers it down to his side, with a confused look on his face. An instant later, he is back to his chirpy self, playing it up for the television audience once again, but Alec can’t help but observe that his warm brown eyes seem a little duller. 

“And cut! Alright, good job today guys,” Jace, their director, announces once the judges reveal the final rankings for the Technical Challenge.

As is the usual practice, the bakers, judges, and host mingle for a while after filming ends for that day, some bakers solicit feedback from Alec or Izzy, while others discuss amongst themselves how their bakes had gone. The friendly camaraderie between the bakers, giving each other tips on how they can improve, showering well-performing bakers with compliments, and encouraging bakers who had underperformed slightly. It warms Alec’s heart to see each season’s bakers forging strong bonds between each other, in a makeshift baking family.

Soon, the bakers start drifting towards the exit of the tent, each of them needing the rest before the gruelling Showstopper challenge tomorrow. Out of the corner of his eye, Alec spies Magnus slipping out of the tent and quickly dashes after him. “Hey, Magnus,” he calls out after the other man’s retreating back as he catches up to him.

Magnus pauses for a moment before turning around, “Hey, Alexander, did you need something?”

“Yeah,” he scuffs one foot against the grass, toe digging into the dirt, before speaking up, “I. Look. I know you like to make the innuendos, but I would really appreciate it if you didn’t uhm, wink in my direction or anything like that when you say them.”

“But I thought you liked them? You used to laugh at them,” there’s a note of hurt in Magnus’ voice, as his face falls.

“No, no, I think they are witty,” Alec hastens to reassure Magnus, “it’s not you, it’s me.”

And Alec could have definitely gone his life without uttering that fucking cliché phrase; he mentally kicks himself for that line.

“It’s not me?” Magnus questions incredulously.

“I’m not explaining this right. I just. I know you like making innuendos, they are good, I like them. But the flirtatious overtone of them, when you wink at me and all, I know you didn’t intend to flirt with me, and it just upsets - ”

“I’m sorry, Alexander, but did you just say that I did not intentionally flirt with you?” 

By the indignation in Magnus’ tone, Alec is starting to realise that he has said something wrong, although he can’t for the life of him figure out what.

“Uh, I’m not saying you need to intentionally flirt with me?”

“Jesus Christ on a pogo stick,” Magnus rubs at his face in exasperation before continuing, “Alexander, if you are upset over the fact that I am flirting with you, then I apologise for that. But if what you are upset about is the fact that you _think_ I am just flirting with you for the fun of it, then you are grossly mistaken.”

Alec can only gape in shock because _mistaken?_ What was he misunderstanding here?!

“Alexander, I am interested in you, I have been for the past year, have you honestly not realised that?”

And Alec has never felt worse than in this exact moment, he is truly a prize idiot. “No, I thought that was just you being friendly and that it was something you did with everyone. And I didn’t want to read too much into it.”

“I can’t decide whether to be insulted about that or not,” Magnus huffs out, “but what did you think us going out for coffee was?”

“To grab coffee for the rest of the crew?” Alec winces as he says that, because he is now starting to realise what a colossal fuckup this whole situation was. Ever since that first meeting, while he had been nursing a crush on Magnus, his insistence that Magnus would never be interested in him had tainted every interaction they had further down the line. 

The moments flash before his eyes, the way Magnus would linger after filming to ask Alec out to grab coffee at the nearby coffee shop, how the other man would make a beeline straight for him whenever there was a break just to have a chat. There was not a day on set that went by without both men talking.

“Did you really think that? Honestly, Alexander!”

“I’m sorry, I just, I didn’t think you would be interested in me! I’m not one of those people you would usually date,” Alec defends.

“Why wouldn’t I be? You are fucking gorgeous, you are an accomplished baker, you helped me find my footing on the show, you comforted me the first time I had to send a baker home, and again when I had to send Clary home. But, more than anything, you are a kind-hearted person. You have the driest sense of humour, you actually want to spend time with me outside of work, you willingly listen to me when I rant about things, you remember my coffee order, you bake me treats on days when you know that things are rough,” Magnus lifts a finger with each point he lists. “I am out of fingers, so this will have to suffice for now, but I like you Alexander, a lot. And I have no idea why you have the ludicrous notion that you are not one of those people I would usually date.”

“Oh,” Alec answers in a small voice, unsure of what to say aside from, “I’m sorry.”

Magnus steps closer, near enough that the tips of their shoes touch, and reaches out, fingers brushing the back of Alec’s hand softly. Alec shyly turns his hand to grab Magnus’, interlacing their fingers.

“May I assume that this is your way of saying that you are interested in me as well, Alexander?” the host says, with a pointed glance at their hands.

“Yes, yes, I am.”

With Magnus’ confession earlier, it gives Alec the courage to also admit, “I like you too Magnus, for the past year as well actually.”

That elicits a half snort-half laughing noise from him. “God, we are a pair of idiots, indeed. Well, shall we go out for coffee and attempt to rectify this? And just to be clear, this is a date that I am asking you on. A date which people who like each other go on.”

“Yeah, yeah, I’d like that,” Alec replies, squeezing Magnus’ hand, and basking in the beam that the other man gives him.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading and I hope you have a nice day 💙


End file.
